Surrender your power unto me foul creature, for I shall feed

paulmoore

Member
This phrase will be spoken by an evil male sorcerer, if that makes any difference in choice of wording...

Surrender your power unto me foul creature, for I shall feed upon your strength!
 

Iohannes Aurum

Technicus Auxiliarius
What does power and strength mean in the context of your request? There are so many different words for specific types of power and strength in Latin.
 

paulmoore

Member
Ahh yes, I have been too vague. I shall set the scene for you in hopes of helping :)

In my story the evil mage has 6 followers, all of them evil mages as well. They are afriad to lose their magical powers because of a war between the forces of light. The evil mages physically create the race of dragons, and the leader(whose name is Tyranus by the way) casts spells that dissolve the magical energy and life force of his 6 underlings, and transfers them to each of 6 dragons, binding the forces to their blood and imbuing them with the power. After the war is over, and the bad guys win, Tyranus attempts to 'draw out' the essences from the dragons and add them to his own, thus the meaning of the phrase. I hope that helps, and sorry for the long description.
 

Akela

sum
Staff member
This actually doesn't sound half bad. Beats Terry Goodkind hands down :hysteric:

Sorry, I don't know if you see the above as a compliment or as an offence :shock:
I just couldn't resist commenting :)

How much progress have you made with the book?



OK, back to the subject at hand.

Surrender your power unto me foul creature, for I shall feed upon your strength!
Transde potestatem, bestia foeda, nam alam vim tuam!

The above is more for my benefit than yours :) *shifty*, so wait for someone to comment before you use it.

I was torn between "ops, opis" (power, might, help, influence, resources) and "potestas" (power, rule, force, strength, ability) for power.

...and between "alo, alere, alui, alitus" and "pasco, pascere, pavi, pastus" for "to feed"
 

paulmoore

Member
No offense taken. I have not read any of Terry Goodkind's books, but he is a multi-million selling author so I will take your comment as a compliment. I am only writing the book for fun, but if I get it done, and people like it, I may consider sending out manuscripts. I have not gotten very far as of yet, although, I do have the entire story in my head. An outline has been formulated but I don't stick to it. I tend to have shifting ideas and I go back and forth between chapters to write my ideas down while they are fresh. I maybe only have about 15 pages so far, but there is so much left to do, and I am having fun writing it so far.

Also, I am not sure if this will make any difference in translation, but the bad guy will be performing a ritual while he is saying this. Will that have any effect on word choice?
 

Iohannes Aurum

Technicus Auxiliarius
Sorry to go off on a tangent, but I am curious on your writing style. Can you input some of your text on the website listed in this thread, viewtopic.php?f=4&t=8913, and tell me who you write like.
 

paulmoore

Member
Iohannes Aurum dixit:
Sorry to go off on a tangent, but I am curious on your writing style. Can you input some of your text on the website listed in this thread, viewtopic.php?f=4&t=8913, and tell me who you write like.
Sure. Basically what I did was I took my entire Prologue(which was only 2 1/3 pages and gave a brief history of stuff that happened 1000 years prior to events in my story) and loaded it up into that program in the other thread. It said that I write like Ursula K. Le Guin. I have no idea who that person is.
 

Iohannes Aurum

Technicus Auxiliarius
Ursula K. Le Guin is famous for writing fantasy and science fiction novels. The Earthsea series of fantasy novels and the Hainish Cycle series of science fiction novels are probably her most popular. I noticed that your writing is indeed similar to Ursula K. Le Guin, especially with all the wizardry and I can say safely that your novel resembles that of the Earthsea series.
 

Bitmap

Civis Illustris
Akela dixit:
...and between "alo, alere, alui, alitus" and "pasco, pascere, pavi, pastus" for "to feed"
alere and pascere mean "to feed someone else"; you could use pasci (medium), but I would think vesci + ablative is the best choice here.
 

Akela

sum
Staff member
paulmoore dixit:
I have not read any of Terry Goodkind's books, but he is a multi-million selling author so I will take your comment as a compliment.
If you had read any of his books (which I have only glanced over), you may not have seen this as a compliment :)

Bitmap dixit:
alere and pascere mean "to feed someone else"; you could use pasci (medium), but I would think vesci + ablative is the best choice here.
I did not even know about vesci.

Like this?
Transde potestatem, bestia foeda, nam vescar vi tua.
 

Bitmap

Civis Illustris
yes, that's fine ... but where did you get transde from? I mean, I think it exists, but isn't trade more common?
 

paulmoore

Member
Akela dixit:
paulmoore dixit:
I have not read any of Terry Goodkind's books, but he is a multi-million selling author so I will take your comment as a compliment.
If you had read any of his books (which I have only glanced over), you may not have seen this as a compliment :)
I suppose that a person could have taken your comment in one of two ways, but it would have hinged heavily on the other person's opinion of the books or they knoew your opinion of the books. In either case, it could have been construed as either his books are a bad read, and beating it hands down would make it worse, or, his books really suck and beating them hands down means that it doesn't suck as hard. :) Luckily, I am an optimist :D But in reality I don't really even tend to read books that much. The only fantasy novels that I have really read were The Lord of the Rings, by J.R.R Tolkein, and believe me I am in no way, shape, or form trying to emulate him. He's in a class of his own.

P.S On a side note, I did see that Goodkind's first book has been made into a tv show called The Legend of the Seeker. I have actually watched a few of the episodes and they weren't too bad, almost on par with the old Hercules: The Legendary Journeys and Xena Warrior Princess shows. IF you truly feel that my material is 'better' in that reguard, then your word are most kind to me!
 

Iohannes Aurum

Technicus Auxiliarius
You can read the lores of Dungeons and Dragons, Warhammer Fantasy, and Warcraft. These games have very deep and dense lores.
 

paulmoore

Member
Iohannes Aurum dixit:
You can read the lores of Dungeons and Dragons, Warhammer Fantasy, and Warcraft. These games have very deep and dense lores.
I am very familiar with D&D. I used to play Pen and Paper with my friends some years ago, and I play all kinds of computer rpg games like Baldur's Gate, Neverwinter Nights, and others that are based off of D&D rules and history. I played all of that plus the old stuff like Legend of Zelda, Final Fantasy and whatnot. Some of the spell structures that I want to use in my book will be slightly based off of spells in D&D, but I want to add some different things to try and make it more my own, and in no way a copy of what's already been done. Then again, if it weren't for Tolkein, all that D&D stuff would have been by the wayside. He created mostly all of it, races of halflings, orcs, elves, trolls, the ranger class, wizard stuff, et cetera.
 

Akela

sum
Staff member
I've watched Legend of the Seeker - that's how I know of Terry Goodkind :)

I meant that as a compliment to you and, at the same time, as a criticism at this world, which makes books like this into best-sellers


Bitmap dixit:
yes, that's fine ... but where did you get transde from? I mean, I think it exists, but isn't trade more common?
I don't know why I chose "transde"... The translation with "trade" would work exactly the same.
 

paulmoore

Member
Akela dixit:
I've watched Legend of the Seeker - that's how I know of Terry Goodkind :)

I meant that as a compliment to you and, at the same time, as a criticism at this world, which makes books like this into best-sellers.
Thank you, you are most gracious!
 

paulmoore

Member
Transde potestatem, bestia foeda, nam vescar vi tua.

Shall this be the best choice? I believe that you said I could also use trade instead of transde, is that correct?
Also, would the retranslation back into English go something like this.."Transfer your power/potentcy, foul beast, for me to feed upon"?
 

Nikolaos

schmikolaos
Staff member
paulmoore dixit:
Transde potestatem, bestia foeda, nam vescar vi tua.
Shall this be the best choice? I believe that you said I could also use trade instead of transde, is that correct?
Also, would the retranslation back into English go something like this.."Transfer your power/potentcy, foul beast, for me to feed upon"?[/quote]
If anything, "trade" might be the better choice since it seems to be more common.

Also, it's actually a literal translation - ". . . for I shall feed on your strength".
 
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